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*~*Inspired by a forum thread:





I didn't know most people dreamed in black and white. ^_^ I learned something today!!!



I myself dream in definate color, lol.



Most of mine are very vivid...



And most of mine tend to leave me in fear from the moment I wake up until even a few days after, looking behind my back in paranoia.



Most of them have these dark figures...

They're always chasing me. When they catch up, I pass out. Then I wake up feeling like I'm falling down, face up. Like I'm laying down. I end up floating lightly in this circular room. I'm surrounded by the hooded looking figures, and they're chanting something. Nothing I can understand, definately not english, lol. I feel like I'm being split into two. Not a hurting feeling though, it's hard to explain. I can't move or fight it either, it's like I'm paralyzed. I always convince myself it's a dream, but then again, I'm not so sure. I'll keep trying to fight it even though it seems useless, and eventually I'll feel a sensation like I'm flying through air, then suddenly in slow motion, I'm in my room again, but it's like I'm in two places at once. Another hard feeling to describe. One place I'm still lying on my bed, and the other I'm slowly floating through my floor, bed, and dresser to get to my bed. Then the two places combine and I open my eyes, wide awake, scared shitless, in my bed. My parents convinced me it's all a dream, but it just doesn't -feel- like a dream. I don't remember falling asleep when it begins. I lay down to sleep, close my eyes, and not even a few seconds later, I feel like I'm being pulled down, through my bed and floor, the opposite of hwo I came back. And all of a sudden I look, and the hooded shadows are there. I sense danger, and run. They catch me....ladadadada... It's really strange, and when I wake up, I still feel unsafe, and like I'm being watched and not alone. It happens about thrice a year, and it seems like every time, when I'm fighting to escape, each time it takes longer, and it's harder, and I lose time. I get the feeling soon it'll be too late, and I'll be stuck there forever. Of course that could just be my fear speaking. I get chills just thinking about it, and I'm scared out of my mind right now, just typing about it.... Anyway...I'll stop now before I go off the edge.



******12/25/05 Update:******



Wait! One more thing.... Sometimes I wonder ya know.... What if it's not 'just a dream' like everyone tells me? It happens right when I close my eyes as my head hits the pillow and it feels like I'm being tugged away. It doesn't feel like a dream. And when I 'escape' or 'wake up' from it, it's like I'm awake, I'm just having to force my eyes open, and force my body to move just to get away from it. Does that make any sense??



Another quick thing too... People are always saying that dreams seem like they last forever, or at least longer than they really are. Like I remember going to sleep, dreaming, and it seemed like I had been dreaming for at least 10 or 20 minutes...But only 1 minute had passed on my alarm clock. When these certain 'dreams' I have happen, this is hard too explain... It's like I'm aware of myself lying in my bed at the same time as I'm aware of what's happening 'in the dream'. And what's happening with me 'sleeping' on my bed is I'm trying to move, yet, I'm moving very slowly. What if this means that I'm experiencing things at a faster form of a different reality or something like that, only it seems like I'm going at my regular time frame until I'm back into our own reality, then in our reality we are actually living very slowly compared to this other reality, but...we just don't realize it? Because we're used to it? And maybe this other reality is far more advanced than us... But... what do they want with me? Why does this happen to me? I don't understand.... It frightens me, yet spikes up a form of curiousity that puts in a fear that I might be killed.... Is it wrong of me to think that? Gah!~!~* I'll stop now...I've completely freaked myself out. I hope whoever reads this can sort out my rambling and actually understand what I'm trying to explain. It's just, I had to get this out of my mind. It happened again a few days ago, and I got up the courage to ask this voice 'who are you?' and it replied 'lucifer'....It really freaked me out.

Anyway...I'll stop now, I promise. .~*~.





~*~*~*~UPDATE

5-18-08



Wow, okay... I just was looking back in my journal and found this.

I found out its linked to me having epilepsy, so HAH!!! I wasn't just dreaming!! Eventhough... now I know it is real.... kind of.

Yet another entry inspired by a forum. It was on trust, and here was my reply...:





Trust.... where to start? Hmm.... well, first of all, I used to trust all my friends, just because they were...well...friendly. lol. Over the years I've learned you can't do that. I don't trust any of my friends to a full extent anymore. I've analyzed them over the years, and I think I know what's best to trust each one with, and what's best not to. For a loved one... It's not really a matter of time...more like a matter of their actions, and whether they can keep their promises, and prove to me by what they do day to day that they have the best intentions for me. That's how it works for me.

This was something I just put in a forum... I liked it and wanted to remember. ^.^ I'm crazy I know.... but here it is:





How do you know we exist? Maybe we only think we do....or your the only one that exists and none of this is real...and this is a hint to you that everything doesn't truely exist...you'll think about it and then decide to ignor the truth going on within your dream reality, because in reality, you're in a coma, and you don't remember or know about it, until you wake up, but then you don't remember this world, and in the real one, you live on mars, having a war with earth.... or maybe, just MAYBE....I'm making all this up because I'm in a rambling mood, and I'm hyper off of the 5 sugar packets I just ate....but who would believe that?? ^_^ Have a nice day!!!!!!!!